The journey you endure during a break-up is one of emotional purity. It’s like your mind is fighting to remove all the toxins, but not before processing them over and over until they can be totally eradicated. The feelings of upset, anger, hate, confusion, anxiety. All of them are key parts of the puzzle we piece together, while trying to understand the situation to eventually move on and grow as a person.
The damage caused by any kind of hurt always has the potential to leave scarring. These scars are the ones that shape us. Ever been cheated on? The scars left are those in trust and security, creating caution in trusting anyone else again. Ever had your heart broken? There are different levels to a broken heart. The worst kind being the shattering break of something that was so pure and real. I think it’s fair to say that we have all seen an example of this in PS I Love You. Where your life seems to fall apart, facing the world isn’t even a possibility, the healing process takes months or years to complete and it’s the support network around you that end up pulling your life together and help you start the healing process.
I think that the way you react emotionally and physically during a break-up shows how much you actually cared for the other person. I’ve been through the type of break-up where you barely even notice that your ex has left and the life you had together is over, instead, feelings of elation and freedom replace him. Yet, there are occasionally the break-ups that cause you more hurt and upset than you could have ever imagined. They catch you completely off guard and knock you sideways, because you genuinely didn’t realise how strong your feelings were and how much hope you had for your potential future with them.
The ones that catch you off guard are hideous. It’s a rare thing to fall exceptionally hard for someone for it then to crash just as quick as you fell. When this happened to me, not only did most emotions react in an overwhelming fashion but my body crashed too. Appetite and sleep became things of the past. Self-preservation abandoned me and sleep was no longer recuperation, instead nights were times of restless tossing and turning whilst my brain whirred and nightmares overcame me.
Either way, whatever the type of break-up you endure, I believe you learn more about yourself in these situations than you would going through difficulties in other aspects of life. A break-up demands self-reflection and causes you to grow as a person. So whatever stage of a break-up you’re going through, just know that you will come out of it a stronger and much surer person.