Third Wheeler

Do you ever get the feeling that you’re Bridget Jones, but at 25 years old? Well, welcome to my world…

Here I am, on a Saturday night, sat at a table in the best local Indian restaurant, acting as the third wheel to my blissfully happy parents as they look lovingly at one another from across the table. Hitting the singles market again wouldn’t be such a shock to the system if it wasn’t for the generic reaction when your friends have already heard that the last relationship didn’t work out. The reaction best described by Monica’s boyfriend Richard in Friends, the question of ‘how have you been?’ usually kicks things off (a very generic question in a catch up) but it’s the ‘sympathetic head tilt’ that goes with it that packs the punch, to which the only response is to provide a tilted nod-along response while saying ‘I’m fine’.

Yet, the world is aimed at couples. Every post on my Facebook news feed is either adverts for romantic weekend getaways, memes aimed at your partners or friends buying houses, having babies and spending their Saturday nights in, curled up on the sofa with their other halves picking out which wallpaper or lamp they’re planning to purchase next.

Don’t get me wrong, seeing the world full of happy couples is what everyone wants for their nearest and dearest. I am a very lucky girl to be surrounded by such wonderful, positive people. From the perspective of a singleton, you cannot help but feel like the minority. Everything is in even numbers, every offer is usually buy one ticket get one free and no one ever wants to sit alone in a restaurant or cinema.

Riddle me this… since when did focusing on yourself become such a bad thing? Relationships often require for your significant other to be your number one priority, but being in a relationship with yourself is one of pure love; spoil yourself, pamper yourself and grow within yourself. I used to believe that it was your relationship that defined you as a person, however, with a fresh perspective on singleton life, I am learning the most powerful kind of love is to love oneself.

I don’t mean this in a selfish, egotistical manner. No. I mean this in the sense of building your own independence, ensuring you’re financially stable, setting your career goals and doing the things that make you happy. Time waits for no man; we all know this. So who wants to sit around waiting for love to stumble upon you. Instead, stop worrying about third wheeling, grab life with both hands and throw yourself into it!

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